I've said it a thousand times, I am not a soapy show fan, but Revenge just too good to leave. The holidays put a bit of a delay on my tv watching and I finally got around to watching my favorite guilty pleasure. By the way, I've come to the sad conclusion that all the shows I have adored in the past few months are classified as "guilty pleasures".
So Kira, or Fauxmanda, as our darling Nolan so fittingly called her, has
decided that she not only doesn't want to leave, she wants to BE Amanda
Clarke, and get all the handsome, bartender perks that come with the
identity, namely Jack Porter. Oh Jack, I understand why you may have
fallen for Fauxmanda's lies, but please snap out of it. Sorry to Margarita Levieva, but I have formed a deep seeded hatred for
Fauxmanda. I know, I know the poor, troubled girl just wants to settle
down and have a life, but seriously, there are far better lives to have
than that of a wrongfully accused, terrorist's daughter. Sure, Jack is
definitely a catch, but he's meant to be with Emily. So back off bitch.
Plus she is mean to Nolan, and I am not a fan of anyone who is mean to
Speaking of people being not so nice to Nolan, the monstrosity that is
Tyler once again rears his twisted little head to cause trouble.
Honestly, I can not stand Tyler, he makes me want to punch things. Which
is just a testament to the awesome acting ability of Ashton Holmes.
Remember when he was Mark on the Rent tour and we all wanted to cuddle
Tyler has apparently stolen our sweet Nolan's credit card, which he
is rationing as payment for services rendered. I guess this means he
fancies himself a hooker then? On the heterosexual side, he did use it
to buy Ashley a killer black dress for the future investors party. I'm sorry, as
much as dear little Ashton may claim in interviews that Tyler does have
feelings for Ashley, I don't buy it. Boy is way to calculated for that,
too Dexter-ish, if you ask me.
As things are starting to spin out of control, Emily calls upon her
Asian Guru of revenge. Um, how many "mentors" does this girl have? The
cops find Frank's phone outside the Grayson house, and decided to build a
case against Conrad.
Lydia who is now wise to Victoria's previous feelings of hatred towards
her, has Conrad relocate her from the Grayson's summer home to... somewhere
else, we never actually do learn where.
Back to Tyler, who Nolan has been ordered by Emily to "take care of".
Nolan calls Tyler over, and despite Tyler's coy advances, Nolan say he
wants the cash back, instead. Go Nolan! Proof the boy was only using
Tyler and not that he had been seduced. [Insert happy dance here]. Tyler tells Nolan to invest in
Grayson Global at the party so that he can get the commission, then
he'll pay him back. Nolan turns him down and leaves, but not before
turning on trusty little shamu.
Side bar, seriously where can I get one of these little whale cameras?
How freaking awesome is that thing? Plus it's come in handy more than a
few times now. It is because of this handy little device, Nolan learns that
Tyler has come into possession of Lydia's banquet speech, which reveals
that the Grayson's framed David Clarke.
To put a tighter leash on the boy, Nolan goes to the inverster's party and
tells The Talented Mr. Hamptons he'll invest if he gives him a little
incentive. Of course, Tyler obliges, reaching a hand to caress Nolan's
face and indulge him in a kiss, when a glass shatters on the floor the
boys turn to find an understandably horrified Ashley, who then runs out. Tyler runs after her and attempts to explain, saying he was only doing "what was
necessary" to get what he needed. He then goes on to tell her she needs
to man up and "get in the game".
There is just SO MUCH WRONG here, I
can't take it. I know, this is a sudsy drama, so clearly Ashley is
going to buy the load of crap Tyler is spoon feeding her, but come on.
First off, from the sight she walked on Tyler was clearly the aggressor.
Even if you are willing to buy that she couldn't have seen or known
that, then fine, how about the fact that your boyfriend was kissing some
one else? For those of you saying, yes but for all she knows it was
just a kiss, it's not like they are engaged. Ok, but the man admitted he
is willing to do ANYTHING to get what he wants. Where's the line? There
has to a line! Would he murder someone to get what he wants? There is
such a thing as too driven.
Also, despite several times having provided commentary on how cut throat
and mean her employers and company seem to be, sweet little Ashley
seems more than willing to throw her friend Emily, who, if I may remind
you SHE introduced into this whole Hamptons circle of wickedness and
deciete, under the bus in order to gain ground with. Note, how after
making plans to discuss Emily with Victoria over brunch the next
morning, she addressed her employer by her first name for the first
time. Ashley's getting a little ballsy. Unfortunately, in this show, that can't be a
But lets end on a happy note, Charlotte and Declan. Love them. Just do.
Although, side bar, Charlotte's text of "2nite's the nite!" seemed a
little cliched. Regardless, they adorable together, hell even their
plotting against Victoria, is somehow quite sweet. I mean come on, we
all knew Declan wouldn't give her up for any amount, despite lack of
funds, the Porter boys are just hopeless romantics. It's nice to see at
least one romance going well in this verse...at least for now.